When a couple desires and plans to have a child, there are many aspects to consider in preparation for conception.  These include the Mental, Emotional, Physical and Spiritual self.  It is highly recommended in Islam to be AWARE of oneself, and one’s acts.  The healthier and purer the heart, mind, and body is, the better effect it will have on the child.  

The environment of where the couple conceives plays an effect on the child.  When we refer to environment we are referring to:

• The ‘pure and prepared’ bodies of both parents: it is highly recommended that the parents cleanse themselves, their thoughts, feelings, body (mind, heart, physical), and that they nourish themselves with healthy options in all aspects of themselves.

• The actual place where the conception takes place: the place of conception should be clean.  Additionally, what the couple will hear and see around them will also have an effect on the child.  

The timing of conception also has a great effect on the child.  This includes the time of day as well as the day of the week and some dates of the year.

Dear Child outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras, salaat, Allah’s names) to recite to support the conception of a child.

During the pregnancy, just as during conception, the temperament and actions of both parents have a direct effect on the fetus.  The mother must be careful to remain in a positive mood and continue to be aware that her thoughts, emotions and actions are directly absorbed by the child.  Equally, it is the role of the father to participate in a caring, understanding and loving environment with the mother, and accompany the development of the child during the nine month period.

For each month of pregnancy, there are recommended foods to eat that will help develop the fetus in a holistic manner as well as recommended prayers to read for each month.  There are also certain foods the mother can eat during pregnancy that will help develop the intelligence, mannerisms and overall good nature of the child. 

Dear Child also outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras, salaat, Allah’s names) to recite during pregnancy for the health of the child as well as for safety and protection, for both the mother and the child, during this period. 

Childbirth is a very beautiful and special time for the couple as they welcome their child into the world.  It is also a very ‘trying’ time for the mother and requires a great deal of patience and strength on her part.  Her demeanor during this time will leave a great impression on the newborn and its transition into the world. She must keep this in mind and stay aware of her emotional state.  To help herself through this, she may want to choose a word or prayer that she will keep on her tongue and say with the each breath during her contractions. This will serve to ease the pain while at the same time connecting her to the Divine Essence.  It is also highly recommended that the couple stay in a state of gratitude and focus on the great gift they are about to receive, keeping in mind that this brief difficulty is just a passage to a world of joy ahead.

Dear Child outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras, Allah’s names) to recite to accompany the couple through this process. 

Once the well awaited child has arrived, we celebrate his/her birth and give thanks.  This involves feeding the believers for the occasion of the child’s birth, and thus, it is highly recommended to invite family and friends on the 7th day after the birth of the child (or near that day) to share in the auspicious occasion of its birth. 

The naming of the child is of great importance.  When choosing a name, one must keep in mind the meaning of the name as this has an effect on the child.  Additionally, it is highly recommended to give the child a name of one of our religions masters as these are especially blessed names that carry a lot of barakah.

Circumcision is recommended to be performed on the seventh day after birth. This makes the body of the child chaste and promotes health. Dear Child outlines a special prayer to be recited during this act.

Aqiqah is highly recommended (mustahab) and it is good to perform on the seventh day after the birth of the child, however it can be performed later also. The ceremony of aqiqah consists of two parts.  The first part is the animal sacrifice, for which, the sacrifice should be a sheep, camel or goat.  For the aqiqah of a boy the animal should be male, and for the aqiqah of a girl it should be female. The animal should be slaughtered in the name of the child for his/her protection. The blessing behind performing aqiqah is to feed the poor. 

The second part of aqiqah is the shaving of the head.  The baby’s hair on the head from the womb should be completely shaved off and the weight of this hair should be given as sadqua in gold or silver coins to the poor and needy people. If coins are not available, then the equivalent should be given in the same amount as money. This hair should then be buried in the ground. It is mustahab (highly recommended) to do this on the seventh day after birth.  Dear Child outlines special prayers to be recited during this act.

Breast feeding is a great time of bonding between the mother and her child.  It is at this time that she can talk to her child and interact with him/her giving a lot of love because this moment provides a direct connection where the impression on the child is enhanced.  She may want to talk to him/her about what is important in life and also recite prayers aloud so the child hears. Even though the child may not understand at the time what all this means, all this is greatly absorbed and leaves a lasting impression.

Dear Child also outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras) to recite to accompany the mother for the preparation and ease of breast feeding.  

The recommended time for breastfeeding in Islam is for approximately 2 years. After that, if it has not already been done, it’s important that the mother wean the child from breast feeding. It is best to do this in a very kind and compassionate manner, with much love. As breastfeeding is not only a source of nourishment but also a source of closeness and comfort for the child. It is important that along with adequate food replacements, adequate love and quality time with the child are provided.

Dear Child outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras) to recite for weaning the child from breast milk.

In the overall care of the child, there are many areas that require attention, some of which are:

• Soothing a Crying Child
• Teething
• Bed Wetting
• Restoring the child to good health when he/she is sick
• Stopping the child from eating bad things
• Accompanying the child to speak
• Accompanying the child to walk
• Keeping the child safe and protected

Dear Child outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras) to recite for all of these areas of attention.

Most of the child’s mannerisms and discipline are learned through the example he/she is exposed to, not only the teachings.  Therefore, it is very important to keep in mind to be a good example for one’s child.  The child absorbs what he sees, learns it, and reproduces it. Similarly, it is important that the child be surrounded by a good company of friends and peers at all stages of his/her life as those people will have an effect on the development of his/her personality.

The child also goes through the four different stages of development and at each stage, parents need to understand what he/she is going through and respond accordingly. These stages are outlined in Dear Child.

Dear Child outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras, Allah’s names) to recite for cultivating good virtues and intelligence in the child, as well as disciplining the child.

Some lovely advice and some beautiful prayers from a parent’s heart for their child.  Connection, both through touch and fruitful conversation, with one’s child is what really gives them a good foundation of love, which they can then easily express in other relationships in their lives.  Their involvement and responsibilities in the active home life, such as participating in household chores and helping in the kitchen, also gives them a sense of belonging and self-worth.  They become aware of their personal needs and are considerate of the needs of those around them.  All this involvement and time given to the child allows them to grow into healthier adults.

Dear Child outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras, salaats) to recite as a gift from a parent to a child.

The parents have a very high position in Islam.  The right of the mother is that she carried you where no one carries anyone. You will not be able to show her gratitude except through Allah’s help. 

The right of your father is that he is your root. Without him, you would not be. Whenever you see anything in yourself that pleases you, know that your father is the root of its blessings upon you. It’s important to praise Allah and thank him in that respect. 

Dear Child also outlines recommended prayers (du’as, suras, salaats) to recite as a gift from a child to a parent.

We are so blessed with all the various du’as, salaats and ziyraats we have available to pray for all the different specificities that we may desire, as well as, the whispered prayers in our hearts. 

Throughout the book, Dear Child conveniently outlines the salaat, and the mentioned du’as and ziyraats, to be prayed in their very own section.